"To get some of the brightest views of the skies, December nights are the best. This month was discernible by a chain of concurrences and it also has the full view of the planet "Saturn". Though a clear sky facilitates the seeing of the winter sky - they are more beautiful to look at while the sky is either deep blue or dark." The bright planets of Venus and Jupiter along with the moon are also coming closer to each other to make an unusual sight. " (taken from The Planet Articles in Encyclo Central)
During this time of my life, there are emotions that I can't escape from. Most of the time, my emotions enclose me and instead of tuning them out, I listen. For some people this is a bad or negative thing because they are unsure of how to respond to it, but I figure that it's for them to deal with. Lately, for the past week or so I've been feeling closer to the universe and further from the world. I can feel the moon beating down on me and the sun caressing me. If I ignore it all, what good will it do me? So what if I'm not being black/white about the thoughts that are currently embodied within me – I don't care if you get what I'm saying or not because to me it makes sense.
Lately, I've been remembering every single one of my dreams and have been taking the time to share them by writing them down. Only certain dreams I remember, others will fade away, and at times I'll remember a part or an image of a dream that didn't piece itself together for me.
Last night's dream meant something to me.
Here's the dream: I was standing on the edge of a beach trying desperately to push the ocean water back, it was dark and the stars enveloped the sky, the ocean and the ground beneath me. Slowly, I'd turn to a voice that was calling me, and nothing was there. When I turned back to face the ocean, it was gone…I was now in an orange grove, much like the orchard in my old neighborhood growing up. I started walking through the trees searching for something and as I continued to walk, I saw a dear friend of mine. He seemed cold and lonely – I approached him and I started to shake off some leaves that clinged to his jeans. When I looked down, I noticed that I wasn't a person, but was a cat. I didn't feel so different, but knew that I had to leave, and just like that I flew away.
I do have an idea of what it means, but that's the personal part for me. Telling you that my dreams mean something to me is vague and general, I'm sharing something general, it's nothing that anyone needs to feel uncomfortable about – we all have dreams. I'm no different from you because I chose to write and think about it.
Some of the people who have been in my dreams lately, I feel a strong connection to and miss dearly inside of my heart. It makes me a little sad, however I know it must be a positive force, not a negative. I miss them and hope life is well on their part.
We are sad people beneath it all, buried deep within the earth's crust begging for life, pleading to be loved, in always despite our faults. That's so sad to me. Lonely is sad. I don't want people to be or feel alone, but sometimes it's inevitable. Everyday, we fight to be happy, in our jobs, in the people we choose to have in our lives, in the books we read and in our choices, we fight to be happy.
I think that birth is the closest thing to death. We are striving for breath, emerging from one dark spot to another maybe even darker spot not knowing what to expect. We end up in the arms of someone who we think is going to love us – but may never will. Dreams bring me closer to life.
Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read this.
